A hard lesson

I've mentioned before that my Daniel is a little impulsive and doesn't seem to think before acting. This is usually at the expense of his siblings. It has been a very frustrating thing for Chad and I to see him float through his life, leaving a trail of tears and turmoil in his wake. We often think he could use an older sibling to show him what it feels like!

Last night, we were at a local corn maze (for the 2nd time this week) and Daniel and Nathan and Leah wouldn't stop teasing each other. We were getting tired of it since they were blatantly ignoring our warnings. We finally told them anyone who didn't stop wouldn't be going to the Spud Day Parade in the morning.

Daniel hid around the next corner and jumped out and scared Nathan, who then screamed like a baby (which is how he always screams). Daniel took off running away from Nathan, then tripped in an uneven patch of ground and started crying like a baby (which how he always cries). I was just thinking to myself that his ankle had better not be twisted or his foot broken, because I was SO not carrying him out of that maze! And then I said that I would stay home from the parade with him.

Daniel didn't even respond. Of course, that's annoying to me as a parent because I want to know that he at least cares he's getting in trouble. Nothing was said about it until bedtime. We had to remind Daniel that he wasn't going to the parade unless he did something to make up for the problem he'd created.

And this is how we are ineffective parents. We tell them we're going to punish them, but don't want them to feel left out and miss the fun with the family, so we find a way for them to get out of it.

And that is exactly what Daniel assumed would happen. Chad told him this morning that he'd better do "x", "y" and "z" if he wanted to go. He instead chose to do "a", "b" and "c". And we were frustrated!

So, while I had continued to get ready as if I really was going to get to go to the parade with everyone else, we did indeed keep Daniel home. He was MAD and crying and pleading and I wanted to give in; make a deal with him. But Chad pulled out of the driveway without us and Daniel went racing around to the backyard.

I checked up on him and saw him letting the dogs comfort him. Then he climbed onto the hood of Chad's truck and sat there for a little while. I hoped he was thinking. And realizing that it was his choices that caused him to be left behind, not mean parents.

I was disappointed that Daniel made the choices he did to end up home from the parade. And I was disappointed to miss the parade myself (it's such a beautiful morning)! But even in my frustration and disappointment, I had to remind myself that a small-town parade is a very insignificant thing and it's more important for Daniel to learn this hard lesson. I only hope he does learn something!